Rlyss

I don't think there's anything wrong with a bit of net surfing or chatting on AIM. I find that talking to strangers online can be very interesting, and since they're anonymous they can give good advice and you can easily open up to them. You've done it right here on the boards, right?

I know you said you don't talk about anything in particular, just chatting, but that's fair enough.

As far as them not being who they say they are, that's never bothered me when I talk to strangers on-line. I mean, if they say crazy stuff and are obviously just screwing around and having a good time, then I'll just not talk to them. But if they seem serious and interesting and have things to say, who cares if they're not exactly who they say they are? I always found it interesting anyway.

But as for the more serious things, congratulations for being clean for so long. You're obviously really enthusiastic about staying clean for your own reasons, not like some people who grudgingly go along with it because they're told to stay clean. You've shown willpower and enthusiasm and a strong desire to change things around and you should be really proud.

I think your number one priority right now is to get an interesting job, or even two if you have the time. I know it's hard to find work (I know as well as anyone how hard and depressing and disillusioning it is) but I also believe that things come good in the end. Get a kickass job and then do what others have suggested and take some classes for fun. The more things you do to keep your mind off being depressed the more opportunities are going to open up to you!