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You've made your bed, and now you're having trouble lying in it. That's all.
Tell her. Take your lumps--even if that means you end up alone. Can you honestly say you still deserve a relationship after all of this mess you've caused? Do you want your daughter raised in a house where the relationships are founded on lies?
Maybe your wife deserves more credit than you're giving her, though. In fact, maybe she always did. Maybe if you come clean, REALLY apologize, and make sure she really sees you've come to your senses, MAYBE she'll be willing to work things out with you.
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