Quote:
Originally posted by lurkette
what if this changes our friendship? my friendship with her husband?
what if this changes Ratbastid's friendship with her/her husband?
what if this changes our marriage? will things ever be the same? will this make us closer, just another experience, or will it create tension and emotional stress?
is it safe (STD-wise)? I'd gotten used to not having to worry about that.
how will I act when she's around with our other friends who DON'T know I'm bi? (Only my husband, my mom and my sister know). Will I have to be out? Will I be able to live with myself if I'm not?
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any change in relationship (going from friend to secondary) is going to change the friendship. it's up to you and her if this will be a positive or negative change. if they are polyamorous, then your friendship with her husband may become closer depending on their arrangement/agreement.
all relationships are changing all the time. any relationship can go from just fine, to better, or worse. if you can't deal with the possibilities, then perhaps you shouldn't try poly.
to answer the first four questions: we cannot predict your future.
talk to your friend and her husband. do they normally practice safe sex with their other partners? have they set boundaries/rules for protection? if you don't know if they're safe, ASK.
only you can answer the last set of questions. it's your life.