KY is the best, really. We use Slippery Stuff here. It's amazing close to the real thing, isn't oily and lasts practically for-ev-er. No taste, no smell
Oh, and don't say 'no pain no gain'. That'll dry her up faster than sea salt (ouch, don';t ask). She wants you to understand her problem and *reassure* her, not give her facts and reality.
If she says it hurts, ask her if it's ok to go on. If she says ok, try a bit more. If she says no, then STOP. Go down on her, talk to her, let her know it's ok. The biggest mistake and the key to most of it is not rushing her and making sure you're ok with it and understand what's going on.
She wants you to make her feel good and show your ehh..manness..heh. But she also is needs some sensitivity, especialy if it's hard to get going.