I've had a similar problem in that I simply wasn't in the "mood" for sex. My girlfriend might try to seduce and arouse me, and that worked, but I might spontaneously lose my erection and just stop.
I reason, I quickly realized, was stress. Very simply, I've only had problems like that 3 times (not that hard to remember how many times you couldn't get/keep it up) and every time has been a time of stress. It doesn't happen anymore because I'm able to recognize when I'm feeling stressed...so instead of having sex, we'll talk about things and just *gasp* cuddle.
My best advice is to relax and stop thinking about it so much. Let it be natural and if you really aren't feeling up to it, let her know. If you have a caring girlfriend, she'll understand and be cool with it.
I'm 19, BTW. Good luck!
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