It's the Battle of the "Ookies". Choose who you would rather be marooned on a desert island with--
Contender #1: Sookie
Pros: Hot; the little gap between her front teeth only makes her hotter. Southern accent (questionable, but still). Will get naked in a heartbeat. Slutty, but in a good way.
Cons: Fang banger. You probably ain't gonna get none unless you're undead. Can read your mind--if things get desperate and you consider killing her and eating her, she'll know and beat you to the punch.
Contender #2: Snooki
Pros: If you have to resort to eating her, should be enough meat on this roly poly to sustain you for weeks, if the fake tan, Aqua Net, and herpes don't make you throw it all back up. Plus, she's got enough booze in her system to give you a buzz with your meal.
Cons: Will have to cut out her tongue to live with her. Slutty, in a bad way. Crabs.
Contender #3: Wookie
Pros: Really tall, an asset when gathering bananas and coconuts. Better conversationalist than Snooki. Snuggling in the warm coat will help protect you from fierce tropical storms.
Cons: Wet dog smell after fierce tropical storms. Male or female, who knows? You will be eaten long before you begin to have hunger pangs. Fleas.
---------- Post added at 10:58 AM ---------- Previous post was at 10:37 AM ----------
Edit: Thanks, Baraka!