Personally, I've always liked olive oil as an anal lube. Never had a problem with it: feels good, works good, smells like fucking in an Italian restaurant.
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Dull sublunary lovers love,
Whose soul is sense, cannot admit
Absence, because it doth remove
That thing which elemented it.
(From "A Valediction: Forbidding Mourning" by John Donne)
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