Plan9

And what does that make you, chief? A daring penis/lance-toting crusader in search of a snatch-dragon to slay? Hardly, especially given your demonstrated experience and attitude. You alternate between whining about losing your manga-obsessed failmound and whatever this thread is supposed to be other than the universal hand signal for the the number 0 crudely oscillating over the shaft of a neglected erection.

Your attitude kinda reminds me of the beginning of that Office Space movie... ya know, where the nerdy white guy is stuck in traffic and thuggin' it out to gangsta rap until he sees an actual black guy and flips out, silencing the music and putting up his window / locking his doors. I'm not a genius, but I get the feeling you puff yourself up with these pejorative and adversarial definitions toward women. I'm guessing if you were in a room with this insta-family female from OkStupid, you'd act like you were reading off the script of The Waltons. Suppose this means I'm just doubting your sincerity as an asshole.

Your keyboard appears to be writing a check your real life can't summon the balls to cash. I'll let you in on something I learned a while back: there is no "us vs. them." We're all little chicken nuggets rolling around in this big bowl, bumping into each other. There are no martyrs, there is no magic. You have issues with women? It's you, no them. You don't wanna settle for someone? Don't, your first clue was that ya even thought about it. You wanna find a fuck / love on the Internet? Pick a goal and work your resources to achieve it. It's like all that old "Carpe Diem" go-west-young-man shit without the haircare products associated with our metrosexual peers. My point: we want your social success war stories, not your emo high school LiveJournal rants.

The Internet is a great place for research and a good place for conversation, but it's not really a place to come for help with your social life. A quick peek at 4Chan or WoW forums is enough evidence. Unless you're looking for real world events, it's an avoidable gaping wound on the old life hourglass.

And newsflash: It's 2010. They let women wear shoes AND vote these days. Get with the program. Everybody likes sex... yes, even the goils.

I'm starting to get you, Mirth. And it scares me. Like a dirty bucket containing a pump bottle of lotion being lowered into a hole.

Say, you find any of my hopes and dreams worth shattering while you're at it?