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Thanks everyone for the information and support!
Cutesundrop - We've thought of using toys before, and once we can afford it we're more than likely going to get a strap-on or at least a vibrator, And i'll absolutly check out the magic wand!
For an update to those that are curious: Things are going okay. Still takes a long time and a lot of frustration, and I havn't had that much success but it's getting easier and less stressful so I'm hoping its just a matter of time.
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