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funny, it sounds like we had the same first experience with colonoscopy, only when I half-woke up I was pretty scared, didn't know where I was, and could feel something writhing there. It was not a pleasant experience and after that I was scared to do it again because I felt a huge amount of distress since I was incoherent and didn't know what was happening to me. I think they should be a lot more careful to make sure either the patient doesn't wake up or that they are awake enough to know what's going on.
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Whether we write or speak or do but look
We are ever unapparent. What we are
Cannot be transfused into word or book.
Our soul from us is infinitely far.
However much we give our thoughts the will
To be our soul and gesture it abroad,
Our hearts are incommunicable still.
In what we show ourselves we are ignored.
The abyss from soul to soul cannot be bridged
By any skill of thought or trick of seeming.
Unto our very selves we are abridged
When we would utter to our thought our being.
We are our dreams of ourselves, souls by gleams,
And each to each other dreams of others' dreams.
Fernando Pessoa, 1918
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