Is pain caused by vaginisimus?
Vaginisimus is an involuntary clamping shut of the vaginal opening. Women's health forums are discussing this issue in detail, which is a step forward for sex education.
I've experienced this first hand, and I can tell you that vaginisimus can prevent penetration. I'm certain that if I my lover and I were not communicating I would have hurt her.
I propose that much of the pain women report in early sex experiences is a result of vaginisimus, and not using any lubrication.
Honestly, it's a crime that we don't teach men how to respect women in sex-ed classes. The first time shouldn't be awful for 30% of women. It does not have to be.
If I'm wrong about the hymen, then why aren't women taught to look for it, and slowly stretch it in the weeks leading up to having sex the first time? Wouldn't that be fair to the woman? Why shouldn't 2 minutes with a mirror replace all that pain?
My reading in college libraries has revealed that doctors won't go on record about hymens in legal proceedings in the USA. In the last 20 years US medical practice has shifted to say "we really can't tell if a woman is a virgin." This too is a step forward for women's rights.
My belief is that statements about "horseback riding" "athletics" and "tampon use" are a way for the medical establishment to slowly and gracefully back out of the hymen story without admitting they were wrong.
Until the feminist movement of the late 60's and early 70's women rarely looked at vaginas, so it was the territory of the male doctor.
I read the post by the mother of young daughters. If very young females have hymens, what happens to them? If 18 year old women had hymens there would be millions of pictures here on the internet. There's a huge 'cult of virginity' alive and well on this planet.
I'm interested in the observations of men and women old enough to be having sexual relations.
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