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i've found myself having to deal with most of the things i've been afraid of--you know, stuffed head first right into situations that gave me no option.
i still dislike heights when there's no barrier between me and the edge--if there's a railing or something, they don't bother me, but a straight drop with nothing to impede--well i don't know, getting sucked by gravity off the edge? i remember being on the roof of a building in philly watching fireworks and having a terrible time of it because i'd start to feel a bit panicky when other people would go to the edge of the building--4 stories up. not that far. strangely, cliffs bother me not at all--i think it's the irregular walls, something in my head tells me i could grab onto or bounce dramatically off one.
spending the rest of my life by myself creeps me out.
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a gramophone its corrugated trumpet silver handle
spinning dog. such faithfulness it hear
it make you sick.
-kamau brathwaite
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