|
If one of the partners believes that the other's actions are sufficient to be deemed cheating, then in that relationship, it is cheating. He failed to inform you of his activities on the affair sites (I assume that he went beyond registration and was actively seeking other women), and the fact that he was exchanging raunchy messages doesn't help matters.
His failure to do so shows that he either didn't feel it was your business, or he assumed that you would be angry and hurt upon hearing of his activities. Since you're in a committed, monogamous relationship, it is your business. Despite this, you essentially manhandled the information from him, displaying an extreme level of distrust and underhandedness.
You are both rightfully angry. I would make a genuine attempt at speaking to him and discovering why he needed to sexually express himself away from you. Your relationship obviously needs work. The trust is lacking, and he is seeking satisfaction elsewhere. Above all, know what you are willing to allow, and do not sacrifice your own sense of happiness by allowing him to explore his 'fantasies' away from you if the idea is emotionally troublesome to handle.
|