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Old 06-04-2003, 03:06 PM   #1 (permalink)
JadziaDax
Loser
 
Location: who the fuck cares?
Classes for Men (don't we wish)

WE seem to have missed the sign-up date deadline, but maybe next year...

CLASSES FOR MEN AT YOUR LOCAL ADULT LEARNING CENTER
SIGN-UP BY MAY 05th

Note: Due to the complexity & difficulty level, each course will accept a maximum of 8 participants.

Topic 1
How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Tray.
* Step by step, with slide presentation.

Topic 2
Toilet Paper: Does It Grow On The Holder?
* Round table discussion.

Topic 3
Is It Possible To Urinate By Lifting The Seat And Avoid Splashing The Floor/Walls And Nearby Bathtub?
* Group practice.

Topic 4
Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper And the Floor.
* Pictures and explanatory graphics.

Topic 5
Dishes And Silverware: Can They Levitate And Fly Into the Sink?
* Examples on video.

Topic 6
Identity Crisis: Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other.
* Helpline support and support groups.

Topic 7
Learning How To Find Things, Looking In The Right Place Instead Of Turning The House Upside Down
* Diagrams and floor plans available

Topic 8
Health Watch: Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health.
* Graphics and audio tapes

Topic 9
Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost.
* Live testimonials. (may be deleted due to unavailability of any men able to give testimonials)

Topic 10
Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly As She Parallel Parks?
* Driving simulation.

Topic 11
Learning About Life: Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.
* Online class and role playing.

Topic 12
How To Be The Ideal Shopping Companion.
* Exercises, meditation and breathing techniques.

Topic 13
How To Fight Cerebral Atrophy: Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries, Other Important Dates And Calling When You're Going To Be Late.
* Cerebral shock therapy sessions (Full lobotomies offered)
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