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Originally Posted by allaboutmusic
I think it would be great for my bride to ask my mother. It might be considered unusual, but symbolically she IS taking over the role that mothers have of caring for their sons.
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Yeah, but this sounds like the bride and groom have never cared for themselves?... I mean, unless you're getting married when you're still a child... I would assume that the groom has learned to take care of himself (independent of mother AND father, and any other caretakers) by the time he's ready to get married, and that the woman has also learned to take care of herself, just as equally, by the time she's ready to get married. Mommy and Daddy are long out of the picture by that point, financially, emotionally, and otherwise, I would hope.
So yes, two people willingly assent to help each other through life, but not in the maternal/paternal sense. It's a totally different form of "caring" for someone, if you ask me. I did not, in any way, shape, or form, symbolically or otherwise, step into the "role" of caring for my husband, as his mother cared for him as a child... and vice versa. The whole idea is rather creepy to me, and suggests an unhealthy feeling of dependence and need to be "mommied" or "daddied."
Also, what Charlatan said.
Our children do not belong to us, and neither do our spouses.