dalnet22

I'll try and keep this short. I was seeing a girl for about 3 weeks, but it was never really dating. We kinda just jumped into relationship habits, but we avoided calling it that cause we didn't want to put a label on us. Everything was solid - I can truly say I trust every world this girl has said. She was open and honest with me at all times. A little over a week ago, she was on aim telling me she's scared she's not ready for a relationship. I then blew up, getting defensive and whatnot because we were doing this on aim and not in person. I guess I accelerated her worrying into a decision that she is not ready. She said she's scared because she likes everything about me, but something is holding her back. She said it was probably her fear of getting hurt, and she also doesn't think she's a good girlfriend. We never talked about it in person - yes I screwed this one up royal.

I wasn't happy about it, and so for the next week I avoided her. When she contacted me, I would respond, but I wouldn't be very friendly, ya know? We have a class together, and I was rather cold to her. I felt like a jerk doing this, but I felt weird just being friends with her when the issue was nothing more than fear. She was still being friendly with me over the weekend, and I was being a little more receptive.

Yesterday was her birthday, so I left 21 roses on her doorstep along with a letter. The letter went into congratulating her, telling her that she's a great person and should appreciate who she is, and all that jazz. I also talked about how I'm not mad at her, I'm just upset because this is something I feel we can work out. I mentioned how I really would like to work it out, and that I think we should talk.

I received a txt msg later last night saying, "thanks, that was really nice." Not knowing what kind of response that is, I say "you're welcome, can we talk?" and she goes "hm, ya if you want. but this week is crazy for me." She definitely has a long week ahead, so after that I asked if I could call her for a minute. She said "sorry no I need to study." Today in class, she flipped the tables on me - I was the one being friendly and upbeat, and she was acting really sad, not saying much. On our way out, instead of talking to me, she said "I'm going home, see ya."

It hurts right now because I feel like I deserved a better response. I think I deserved a discrete, honest response like "thanks, but I'm sorry, I just want to be friends." Instead, I'm left sitting here having to interpret what she's said, and it doesn't sound good at all. I think it's her who should be coming to me, but why would someone who's scared want to fix it? That's why I guess I've tried to take the matter into my hands.

What do you guys think? Is it possible she is stressed, and after a week or somethin, she will talk to me? It really hurts to think I'm losing my chance with her, let alone a friendship. Is there any chance of this working out?

By the way, we're both 21, not in junior high which it might sound like with the stupid AIM and texting.