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Originally Posted by analog
“I mumble a lot off-stage, I'm a mumbler. If I'm walking with a friend and I say something, he won't hear me, he'll say 'What?'. So I'll say it again, but once again he doesn't hear me, so he says 'What?'. Really it's just some insignificant shit that I'm saying, but now I'm yelling, 'That tree is far away!' - Mitch Hedberg
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This is so me. I mumble to myself a lot, and my SO will hear me mumbling from the other room. Thinking I'm talking to him, he'll yell, "WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?" or something else to that extent at the top of his lungs. Now, half-deaf, I have to reply, "I wasn't talking to you." "HUH?" "I wasn't talking to you!" "WHAT?" "I WASN'T TALKING TO YOU!" "THEN WHO WERE YOU TALKING TO?"
"MYSELF, DAMMIT, I WAS TALKING TO MYSELF!" And then my witty inner monologue is utterly ruined, because I chanced to whisper a bit of it aloud.