I guess this belongs here. A story for you guys. It involves myself, my brother in law, and our friend Zach. If you're wondering, HEB is a chain of grocerty stores we have over here. Kinda like Wal Mart.
So on our way to see Rufus Wainwright this past weekend we stopped at a...I think it was like a super HEB or some shit. Anyway it's me, Jesse, and Zach. Zach wanders off and we're like "Zach where the hell are you going?" He was like "Shh wheres the bakery?" Anyway we stumble across this Gelato stand instead. If you've never had it before...it's delicious. Very creamy. We all decide to get some. The chick scoops a shit load of this gelato into this tiny cup and we start eating it and head for the door.
We get outside completely ignoring the fact that we came in through the opposite side of the store and had to walk forever. So it starts slowly melting in the smoldering heat outside. We're all laughing like "Oh shit" and just licking it up as it runs down. No big deal really just gotta eat it a little faster right?
Well it turns out in that heat you can't eat it fast enough! What started out as one or two drips here and there turned into it just pouring and melting all the way down our hand.
So we panic! We start running and trying to eat it faster and faster. Jesse's yelling at Zach "This was the worst idea ever!" I'm screaming from brain freeze and trying to resist the urge of puttin my gelato filled fingers to my head in pain.
Zach "This is aweful!"
Myself "This is a disaster!!"
We finally get to the car but our hands are just covered in this shit. Jesse throws his away, Zach finishes his, and I eat almost all of it and throw the rest away.
So our hands are ridiculously sticky. A smart man would think well...lets just walk the short distance we walked the first time back into HEB and wash our hands clean. We're apparently not smart men. Zach opens the trunk and reaches into his bag and pulls out a bottle of Scope, and a bottle of Powerade. I know.
So he decides we can either clean our hands with Scope or Powerade. Why Powerade you ask? I have no clue. So Jesse and I use the Scope and Zach uses both because well....only an even bigger dumbass would try to clean his hands with fuckin powerade. We wipe our hands off with a towel.
So that was done with and all our hands now had fresh breath. I was like "Dude it smells like I was holding two handfuls of mints melting in the sun." Like I'm just walking around with them going "Dude I can't eat all of these it's too many! Does anyone want em? I can't just throw em away! Damnit they're melting!! Help me!" Anyway thats how I felt.
Long story short, gelato is definitely an indoor dish. Either that or make sure the girl who sells it to you gives you a shit load of napkins.
I thought this was pretty funny haha. Good times.
Asta!!
