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Originally Posted by ratbastid
Issues like this have been discussed here a lot. The consensus is: if you can't tell your partner about it, it's cheating. It's not the act that defines right or wrong, it's the secrecy.
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Exact-a-mundo. The act itself, there's *nothing* dirty or gross at all! It's the feeling of guilt that suggests something wrong, the secrecy.
I suggest that you bring it up with her. It sucks to have things like this hanging over your head unresolved, and you never know, she might surprise you. Good luck, and please let us know what happens, either way.