Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community - View Single Post - My biological clock... or is it a time bomb?

Mrs Master · 09-23-2006, 11:28 PM

I had my first at 19 and my second at 26. I was the neighbourhood baby sitter for years growing up, often for free becaused I loved and doted on children and babies. I thought having a suprise pregnancy at 19 was managable even though a shock. My first mistake was the thought that I could have a little person to love me and be loved by me, someone who would grow in mine and his fathers image, dreaming of the many pround occasions I would be witness to. Its a romantic thought but not real. The novelty wears off in no time, and Im not just talking about the dirty nappy, sleepless night stage, that was easy. As my boys have become older they have developed into people that are nothing like me. One, Im a girl, cant do girly things with boys, I dont even know what boys like to do, except for what my partner tells me. They lie, are self centred, messy, manipulative, and challenging in every way possible. They will push every boundry I set and my god I have to remain consistent, thats not easy once they know your weaknesses. Once they're at school the costs $$$ wise becomes a big issue. Theres a lot more peer pressure out there these days for parents to provide material rubbish so that my son can have what little Johnny has, and every parent seems to be suckered into it, hence the added pressure.

'Johnny has a new computer in his room, johnny has an x box, johnny has a mobile, johnnys going to dreamworld, seaworld and movieworld on the Gold Coast for school holidays, why do we have to go camping?'

"Because you havent earned those hundreds of dollars."

'neither has johnny.'

"No, his parents are victims of fashion and people pleasing, and so are 70% of the other mums and dads of the kids in your class."

(Then they feel left out if you dont, and dont invite their friends over because our place is boring, they have to actually use their brains and play).

The list here is nothing, 1%, and I feel as though Im competing with all the other mums when I dont give it

.

Ive lost sight of the woman I once was and find child rearing a very painful exercise with the challenging moments far out weighing the proud ones. Not what I orginally thought it was going to be like. Just wanted to give you a little reality check before you decide. Make sure too that if you and your partner were ever to break up, you are not just mum but mum and dad.

The ironic thing is, about once every 6 months I start dreaming about having another one. You work it out.

09-23-2006, 11:28 PM	#7 (permalink)
Mrs Master Tilted	I had my first at 19 and my second at 26. I was the neighbourhood baby sitter for years growing up, often for free becaused I loved and doted on children and babies. I thought having a suprise pregnancy at 19 was managable even though a shock. My first mistake was the thought that I could have a little person to love me and be loved by me, someone who would grow in mine and his fathers image, dreaming of the many pround occasions I would be witness to. Its a romantic thought but not real. The novelty wears off in no time, and Im not just talking about the dirty nappy, sleepless night stage, that was easy. As my boys have become older they have developed into people that are nothing like me. One, Im a girl, cant do girly things with boys, I dont even know what boys like to do, except for what my partner tells me. They lie, are self centred, messy, manipulative, and challenging in every way possible. They will push every boundry I set and my god I have to remain consistent, thats not easy once they know your weaknesses. Once they're at school the costs $$$ wise becomes a big issue. Theres a lot more peer pressure out there these days for parents to provide material rubbish so that my son can have what little Johnny has, and every parent seems to be suckered into it, hence the added pressure. 'Johnny has a new computer in his room, johnny has an x box, johnny has a mobile, johnnys going to dreamworld, seaworld and movieworld on the Gold Coast for school holidays, why do we have to go camping?' "Because you havent earned those hundreds of dollars." 'neither has johnny.' "No, his parents are victims of fashion and people pleasing, and so are 70% of the other mums and dads of the kids in your class." (Then they feel left out if you dont, and dont invite their friends over because our place is boring, they have to actually use their brains and play). The list here is nothing, 1%, and I feel as though Im competing with all the other mums when I dont give it . Ive lost sight of the woman I once was and find child rearing a very painful exercise with the challenging moments far out weighing the proud ones. Not what I orginally thought it was going to be like. Just wanted to give you a little reality check before you decide. Make sure too that if you and your partner were ever to break up, you are not just mum but mum and dad. The ironic thing is, about once every 6 months I start dreaming about having another one. You work it out.