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Well, do you still like this girl and want to pursue a relationship, or do you just want to be friends? If you want to date her, I would not ask confrontational questions like, "how come you're writing after X amount of silence?" That's too standoffish and she will feel put on the spot.
As far as your inital situation, she probably was not interested in you because she might have been bored. Not that you are boring, but there was no chase or excitement involved. She knew she could have you any time she wanted, and she lost any interest she might have had.
Now that you're not smothering her with attention, she's probably thinking, "Damn, he's not been calling me lately... I wonder why." And her interest may be piqued a little bit. Either that or she's just being polite and inviting you to her party.
Anyways, if you want to date her, you can't start smothering her with attention again. Make her work for it. Don't always be there 24/7 or she will quickly lose interest again.
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