Several typed and deleted drafts later, my synopsis: I don't think you're over-thinking this and I do think you have plenty of valid reasons to be concerned. Maybe she just does like hanging out with the dude. But a sudden change like that.....I'd be wondering what's going on.
Ultimately, do you deserve to be treated the way you're being treated? Do you feel like the level of commitment and effort you're putting out there is being reciprocated, even in the most half-assed of ways?
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I've got the love of my life and a job that I enjoy most of the time. Life is good.
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