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Look: I was 21 when I got married, but I was a hell of a lot older than your wife seems to be. She wants her freedom, but she doesn't want to end the gravy train and have to start supporting her own happy ass. She only gets it both ways if YOU LET HER.
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qft. You need to put some fuckin' pants on and talk this out. If you want the marriage to go further toward the fiery pits of relationship hell, by all means take a stand-offish approach...... or..... you could talk to her about it. 
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"I'm typing on a computer of science, which is being sent by science wires to a little science server where you can access it. I'm not typing on a computer of philosophy or religion or whatever other thing you think can be used to understand the universe because they're a poor substitute in the role of understanding the universe which exists independent from ourselves." - Willravel
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