Mal, the way I found out is that her hubby finally told me about it. I could tell he wasn't talking to me nearly as much as he used to, but I figured, hey, people come and they go. I didn't even fret about it, because I had no inkling that there was any possibility that anything was wrong.
Daniel_, apparently she is so incensed at me about the whole thing that she doesn't even want her hubby to have anything to do with me, so that's why he hadn't spoken to me. I can see he feels badly, I don't think he felt anything of the kind at the party...but of course, she's his wife and he should honor her feelings/requests.
This wasn't even the first time we'd gotten together. They came with some friends (their best friends are another couple with whom I used to work with the wife, and we were also decent friends, several jobs ago) to see one of my shows, and us three gals had emailed each other a few times about what we were gonna wear to the party, etc. I want to ask the hubby if the other gal had been told of this whole thing, I can't imagine that she hadn't, as they're all really close friends. I would have thought the other gal would have stood up for me...*shrug*.
Shani and Redlemon, thank you very much.