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Originally Posted by MEAD
Wow, the response has been overwhelmingly negative. I totally understand that. But the people with these complaints seem to be odler folk. I'm a young guy (20) going after a young girl (19) who may or may not be involved. It's dating, not marriage at this point of my life.
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This suggests that you do not see dating as a commitment. Dating is a commitment. There is value in a connection even in casual dating. To try and destabilize that connection is disrespectful of both parties. It's really that simple.
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Originally Posted by MEAD
To assume that everyone at my age is as commited as a married couple is foolish. People date to find that special person that they could be with for the rest of their lives. They don't date to settle on one person and block every other possible opportunity out. My intentoin was never to trick or pressure this girl into anything, but to merely be perhaps a better opportunity. And I don't think so lowly of myself as to believe that I couldn't possibly be better than the guy she might currently be dating, or any guy any girl I might become interested in is currently dating for that matter. I'm sorry but I just won't be that insecure even if you do want to call it cocky. It just seems to me that pretty, smart, and funny girls don't stay single for long. Just because I wasn't there the second one becames available doesn't mean I don't deserve one.
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You're 20? Well guess what...most of the people who have responded to your post are or have been 20 at one point or another. For me, it was only 2 years ago. I am not an old fogie looking back to the 50s for advise on modern dating (not that there's anything wrong with that). I simply have the perspective of some extra time and experience. I've never once persued a woman or girl that I knew was dating someone else exclusively because to persue her is to tempt her into being unfaithful. Like several have said in this thread: you don't want to turn a girl into a cheater and then date her. If she's already a cheater, she's bad news and not worth your time. If she cheats for the first time with you, then it's likely you might have created a monster.
There are pretty, single, funny, single girls out there. Go find them.