You can love someone with every molecule of your being and still not be able to make a relationship work. Or want to. Love can, but does not always, conquer all. A child in the mix can be very difficult and affect a relationship in many different ways. I was involved in a relationship with a man who was going through a divorce and has a child who was 3 at the time. It balanced out for awhile because of her age and ability to accept new people. I cannot say that it would have been as easy if she were 6 or 8 at the time. The feelings that I developed for his daughter were a big problem for the relationship because I found it very easy to fall in love with his adorable, intelligent, and mischevious little munchkin. It freaked him out because of his own baggage. We did not have the age difference, but other issues surrounding his daughter and exwife ultimately contributed to the demise of the relationship, in my opinion. In that particular situation there were many other variables that have come and gone, including stereotypes, misconceptions and mistrust that stemmed from some of the above issues. And, even though he depended on me for a lot of emotional support, I couldn't be his therapist (my background) or sacrifice my happiness for his. I learned that the hard way after the second breakup. After the third (*sigh*), I was reminded again that he is going to have to figure out how to help himself and figure out what he wants and how to achieve his own happiness. He's doing it, too, which blows my mind and makes me happy.
Though you love them and they might love you, sometimes the baggage just out exeeds the weight-bearing restrictions of the relationship. It doesn't mean you love them any less.
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Here's how life works: you either get to ask for an apology or you get to shoot people. Not both. House
Quote:
Originally Posted by Plan9
Just realize that you're armed with smart but heavily outnumbered.
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The question isn’t who is going to let me; it’s who is going to stop me. Ayn Rand
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