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Since she doesn't see a problem, I suggest something a bit unusual. Videotape her one night when you've gone out. Go home, turn on the cam, start talking back and forth, honestly. When she sobers up, play the video.
It doesn't matter what you could say, humans have a great capacity for denial when confronted with less than stellar behavior. Seeing it from the outside, knowing that's her in all her drunken glory, might give her pause.
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Don't blame me. I didn't vote for either of'em.
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