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UnclePhil likes to take long walks in the forest dressed up like Hansel... He dreams that one day he will find his Gretel and they will discover the joy of getting lost and living in a house made of candy.
Sadly, all he ever gets is a cold.
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"My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars."
- Old Man Luedecke
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