Thank you...I am glad you enjoyed it, and I am alos glad you told me about what was wrong with it alos. This is a S.S. I wrote a while ago when I first started writing. I am wondering if I should go back and rewrite it, using better grammer and sentance endings, or leave it and use it as an example as I write more, maybe to compare...anyway, thanks agin for the comments
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Originally Posted by tecoyah
Though a long read, I found it well written and fully entertaining.
I do wonder at the Forced cutoff of sentance structure.....as if attempting to fit a story into a poetic mold. It may be a style I am unfamiliar with, but it did make the reading less enjoyable for me.
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