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Originally Posted by JoseFlanders
While I`m speaking from the viewpoint of someone who`s still in a young relationship, and may thus have a more idealistic viewpoint, genuine love, and being increasingly familiar and comfortable with each other lessens the problems that we might otherwise have with appearances.
Don`t get me wrong--intial attraction has to be strong (imo) to help this situation. Initially thinking, "oh, he/she is attractive, but I want their chest to be bigger, legs a little thinner/longer", can, snowball in a way similar to the scenario you described for us, Uptown.
It`s also good to be looking out for your partner`s health in the first place...be sincere about it, even if you want them to go to the gym with you so they can look great. I`ve also found that when my SO has been honest, but less pushy about certain physical issues of mine, I`ve been more willing to work on them. (I.E., the slight gut that I had due to a liiiittle too much beer).
Just some thoughts. I`d have to say uptown made some good points, and I`m pretty much in line with `em.
-Sean
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Jose,
I'd say if you're beginning a relationship thinking things like "oh, he/she is attractive, but I want their chest to be bigger, legs a little thinner/longer" then perhaps you be really checking out your motives for dating this person. Are you truly interested or just horny and/or tired of being alone and thinking the person will due "for right now" Honesty is important and it has to start with self-honesty.If a specific physical appearance is really important to you that's cool but commiting to a relationship with somebody like they're a fixer upper old house that doesn't quite met your needs/desires is a situation that's bound to cause hurt on both sides.