Um, if you're almost 20 and she's 16, I think there are laws that pretty much keep you apart, sexually speaking. She's 16 - at that age, it's perfectly normal, if not necessarily healthy, for a girl to care what other people think and be very impressionable and easily led. Which is why there are laws keeping 16-year-olds from dating 22-year-olds. And 20-year-olds, for that matter.
I say go meet someone your own age. 4 years is not a big age difference when you're a little older, but at this point you're in completely different places, developmentally speaking. And your being involved with her is not good for her, or for you. In fact, it's a little creepy, IMHO.
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