zen_tom

doc - thank god! I find it so upsetting to hear people sniping at this or that piece of random behaviour, whether its using your mobile phone on a train, drinking red wine with fish, being late for a meeting, heaven forbid *touching* someone in public, wearing the wrong kind of shoes, your watch on the wrong wrist, being foreign, poor, too cultured, or not cultured enough, or whatever current thing is pissing off the masses this week.

The truth is that there are always going to be some people who are bitter, ungracious and miserable - it doesn't matter what the behaviour is, these people are always going to find something to snipe at and make snide remarks about. Normally, I take it as a sign of low self-esteem. There is a certain level of empowerment in criticising someone else's behaviour. The problem is, in acting this way, you have to accept either becoming a hypocrite, or put severe limitations on your own behavioural responses.

Often, it is best to treat everyone with honesty and respect. If you feel threatened by someone, or feel that they have something you don't, try to simply walk away. Accept that they are different, and try to tolerate them.

The more you tolerate the things you dislike about others, the more you will learn to tolerate the unpleasant things about yourself. But this is just a part of growing up and naturally comes in time.

Of course, it can be refreshing and fun to vent abuse at a certain group of people, it is a perfectly natural, and common human behaviour - just as long as we all remember that it's just a way of letting off a bit of steam, and we realise too, that one day, it is we who are going to be the frustrations and the laughing stock of some group or other.

So please, try not to be ungenerous, bitter, sour-mouthed sneerers. We all have to do it sometimes, but if there's one thing I hate, and can get ungenerous, bitter and sour-mouthed about, it's that.