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I love those eyes, individually. But you're right, they don't quite go together. But the detail and shape of each eye individually looks really good. And as for the sharp lines, I like them, but I'm more of a cartoon inspired guy and I've never been good at the realism thing. But if you're going for realism, yeah, use different pencils and smooth the shafdows out. Or just try to style it up a bit so that it's not realism and not cartoonish.
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