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Originally Posted by zipper
There were was one time when she let things get a little out of hand w/one couple....she started a relationship w/the other man.
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I'm all for sexual freedom, living in San Francisco right above the Castro, and in the Castro before that, but what she wants sounds like it's crossing over from freedom to recklessness. My instinct tells me there's some damaged pathology deep inside her, with her craving "attention" from other men when you're not around, despite all it sounds like you do for her. She may become defensive or skittish if you really try to dig in and figure out what's going on inside her head, but I think things will only deteriorate if you two don't sit down and have a long talk. I hope you have no shocking revelations about her, but you can't let that fear hold you back.
Also, it's not quite clear to me how the situation has evolved. You were having sex with other women with her there, but then you say she hurt you by being with other men? What does "anything goes" mean in this context?