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When my wife was working, she'd have the same attitude about money: my salary was for our living expenses and hers was for whatever she wanted it to be for. We had a chat after she said that and she realised it wasn't fair. Quickly resolved.
She doesn't work anymore (she wants to, but she wants to be at home with our 2 year old daughter more) so the way we work it is thus - envelopes. Every month after I get paid we divy up my salary into envelopes for all our major expenses: rent, savings, groceries, car, entertainment, the kid's school fees, and a monthly allowance for her and myself (hers is 50% more than mine because she has to cater for the fat kid as well). The excess goes into a different envelope that is used for emergency expenses (such as medical bills when I was in between insurance) and then whatever's left goes into the bank at the end of the month.
It seems to work pretty well.
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