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I also admit that I am more careful when my step-daughters are around men, but given the reality, I don't appologize for it. (I don't freak out either).
But as for myself, I am very careful to avoid the appearance of impropriety when I am with around other female children.
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"Of all tyrannies, a tyranny exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It may be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end, for they do so with the approval of their own conscience." – C. S. Lewis
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