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Old 05-07-2005, 06:39 PM   #9 (permalink)
Rodney
Observant Ruminant
 
Location: Rich Wannabe Hippie Town
Quote:
Originally Posted by kramus

I'm not sure what the purpose of this post is other that to say I do find this a bit - odd, or unsettling - probably because something I've been so used to for so long is growing in a direction that I am not really part of. What post-partum thoughts would people have to share - what do they see anew, or different, or again in times like this?
What feels odd is that you two split up, but you were still the man of the household, doing stuff for her that she couldn't do herself and even sleeping with her sometimes. You still had that role, because you were willing to do it and she was willing to ask you.

Now she's moving off and dating other guys, and you're realizing that you can't really be the man of the household anymore; it's not your household anymore (though the house is half yours). And that's a bit of loss, a piece of adjustment that you're now having to make. And you're making it, and now you're realizing that since you can't really be the man of the household anymore, it's inappropriate for you to do the household chores. So you turned down her request, and she's a little upset because it makes her life less comfy. You're not going to be there for her in the same way; which is kind of what she should expect, but she hasn't thought it through, yet.

But she will. She'll figure out that boyfriends won't be too happy to find you out front cutting the lawn when they come over for a little visit. Because they're auditioning for your old job, and they're not going to believe she's a serious "employer" if you're still around. She can't go her own way _and_ lean on you for all the little husbandy things.

You two are still going to be parents together of your children, though, and in seeing to their welfare you're both going to be partners for a long time.
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