Yeah, as whocarz said, it's all done in-game. Read your manual, pretty much =) I use an app called GameRanger, but that's Mac-only, which does the hard stuff for me. But it's pretty straightforward in most games - set your options, tell the other players your IP addy and start the game.
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"'There's a tendency among the press to attribute the creation of a game to a single person,' says Warren Spector, creator of Thief and Deus Ex."
-- From an IGN game review.
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