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What you need is a whole heap o' luck, dude. You'll be hard pressed to find an adult community that doesn't think their game is the world, especially with BF1942. Depending on your tastes, though, there are a few games out there that do cater to what you're wanting.
I don't have either BF1942 or a computer that can run it, but going from my experience with Jedi Knight 2, servers where everyone just plays the game are few and far between. Mindless CPU team-mates are quickly replaced by griefers, team-killers, whiners, noobs, botters, cheaters, chat-whores and so forth. Your best bet is to find a server that is actively administrated, these tend to have the fewest morons on there.
An alternative to this is getting a bunch of your pals together and playing just between friends. I'm sure there's plenty o' people here on the TFP that'll be up for a few games. It's a much nicer evironment than public servers.
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"'There's a tendency among the press to attribute the creation of a game to a single person,' says Warren Spector, creator of Thief and Deus Ex."
-- From an IGN game review.
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