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I'm truly sorry for you. One of the likely outcomes of being a partier is that you wind up with another partier for a spouse, and then stuff like this follows.
I'm much more sorry for your child.
The stereotype that men can't make commitment, and that women just want to tie a man down is laughable in view of this poor man's dilema. This wife is unable to deal with commitment.
Odds are that the woman will get full custody of the child, and then poor sap will pay about 1/3 of his income in child support from now until the kid is 18 or more. Our society is sexist, but in family matters, it is very much in favor of the women/mothers. So the guy who impregnates a bad woman not only gets laid, he most sincerely get screwed as well. And the poor children are the biggest loosers of the deal.
If you feel that you love her, you'll have to accept that she isn't capable of commitment or faithfulness. You set the conditions you'll be agreeable to and stand by them no matter what she does. Something like: I'll be here, and take care of our child. You can be here with us, or go party. But you can't come home drunk. You can't treat our child as someone who you can drop off when you want some free time. And so forth. Then stick to it.
Such structure, and knowing that you know she's failing to meet your needs, or your child's needs, but that you're rising above that and meeting your child's needs without her, may help her reflect on what she fears from acting grown up, and help her to grow up, or straighten up.
And since she's being such a little girl, emotionally, you might consider treating her like a little girl, and telling her that each time she stays out late, either partying or playing around, she will have to submit to a spanking when she gets back home. Putting her ass over your lap and paddling it will likely help her feel repented of her sins, and may help her feel sorry for what she's done wrong. And it may help you act out your anger and frustration in a somewhat socially acceptable way. Knowing she deserves a good spanking will help you feel right about administering it. And putting her into that bare bottom up position and then holding her there while you redden her cheeks and watch them bounce when smacked, may help you forgive enough to want her sexually again. And I get right turned on just thinking about spanking my lover, with her lovely ass up on my lap. A good spanking, some remorse, and some hot sex will help you transition back into a couple again after she wanders.
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Trueheart
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