crow_daw

OK, so listen to this fucked up story. My friends and I go to have a party to celebrate two of our friends' birthday, which just so happened to fall on the same day. One of said birthday boys, believe it or not, was none other than H12.

Now, when we have small get-togethers, they pretty much go very well. We just get together, drink a little bit, no harm is done. We've had one huge kegger before and it actually went extremely well. Massive success. So we thought we would try again, but not go for as big a party this time, but still just as fun.

So we get a keg.

Now the disclaimer. I'm always preaching about how I don't like it when people here bash the South. This story contains one incredibly drunk asshole. He's a big corn-fed motherfucker. BUT do not judge the South based on this story, because, regardless of what some of you may think, you're going to find assholes like this ANYWHERE YOU GO. So this is my thread, and if you're planning on responding with a cute little "Well, it's TN....nuff said" remark, then just have enough respect for me and my thread to not do that. I'm not opening up a redneck-bashing thread here.

This guy shows up with some mutual friends of ours. He's one of these 26 year old dudes who still comes to what basically amount to high school parties because he has no life. We didn't really want him there, but he actually is a pretty nice guy most of the time, he just had a little(well a LOT) too much to drink this particular night.

First of all, it all started with H12(keep in mind it's HIS fucking birthday party) getting his cup stolen by another friend of ours, who just so happens to be the assholes little brother. Well H12 tried to get his cup back, and was very civil about it as well. But the little brother was drunk too, and took it all the wrong way. So he hits H12 in the face. H12 is sober, so he tries to calm him down. I see this whole thing transpiring and I walk up to see if I can mediate. The big guy then comes up to me and asks me if I was starting shit with his little brother. I tell him no, and I really wasn't because his little brother is my neighbor and we're actually pretty good friends. So he tells me "Good, don't start no shit with my brother." Then, while he's still talking to me, he just fucking hauls off and punches H12 right in the fucking head. But then he backs off, apparently satiated. He then apologizes to me, and says it was a misunderstanding(now me and this guy were not prior friends, but for some reason he took a liking to me, and I'm glad of that, but he still was being a huge dick to everyone else.) H12 tries to apologize, and does actually eventually get it worked out. Thank God.


But ladies and gentlemen, that's not all. A friend of mine who is in the U.S. Army came with two if his Army buddies. I didn't talk to either one of them, but they seemed cool enough, and everyone else who did talk to them told me that they were indeed two very cool easygoing guys.


After the entire H12 thing had subsided and was over, everyone pretty much got back to the party. I was just mingling, and I go to refill on beer. So I walk to the keg, and the asshole is sitting there next to one of the soldiers. I missed the entire conversation prior to this, but when I got to the keg, the asshole says "Hey Crow, tell this guy he better not fuck with me man." And I thought he was joking. So I told the guy not to fuck with him, with a very light tone. I didn't think anything would come of it. Well I get beer and I get about two steps away when BOOM! the asshole punches the soldier right in the face, for no apparent reason. The guy runs off to the shadows to recuperate for a second and the asshole goes and uppercuts him. He then returns, laughing and shit, and everyone is pretty much just staring at him. The soldier gets with my friend(the Army friend, with whom the now-injured soldier arrived) and they leave.

Well my Army friend calls my cell phone and says, "That motherfucker is going to die tonight." I try to talk him down, but he's dead fucking serious. I mean me and my friend get along great, but he is kinda crazy at times, so I believe him. And the rumor was that his soldier friend, the one whose face was now desheveled, was even crazier. So I get worried, and start trying to talk him down, but he won't listen and eventually hangs up. So this party is essentially ruined and with it my two good friends' birthday. I'm worried to death thinking there's going to be a fucking homocide, and my Army friend calls back and says "Tell every minor there that's drinking to leave, cause I'm calling the cops." Again I tried to talk him down, cause we're at my friend's house, and that would fuck him over big time and he hadn't done anything wrong. Again he refuses to give in. So I start going around to my underage friends, telling them they should get out of there, when I run into my Army friend's ex-girlfriend, who is still pretty obsessed with. I explain the situation to her and she calls him. She calms him down and he agrees not to call the cops.

By this time the asshole is trying to hang around me alot and is making me very uncomfortable. I was just waiting on something else bad to happen. So me and the two birthday boys broke out of there. To my knowledge everything went reasonably well after we left, but it was still the worst, most disturbing party I've ever been to.

Why do some people have to be such assholes?

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"We each have a star, all we have to do is find it. Once you do, everyone who sees it will be blinded." - Earl Simmons