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tooth · 07-22-2004, 07:50 AM

I'm in the same boat, guys. Reading these posts, I felt like I could have written each one.

Married for 6-1/2 yrs. We've been together for over 12 years. I have gone through most everything you guys have been talking about.

Cold, cold, cold, or HOT, HOT, HOT. No middle ground. Sex is great when we have it. She's really into it and adventurous. But if she's not in the mood, I'm lucky to get anything more than a peck on the cheek. I don't need sex all the time. Wouldn't it be nice to just play around once in a while?

I feel like she is not attracted to me when she keeps shooting down my advances. She tells me I am all wrong on this. But how am I supposed to feel when her words say one thing, and her actions tell me something completely different.

Other than taking her out drinking, I have no idea what it takes to get her turned on. I can be as sweet and romantic as can be, and feel like I may as well be insulting her mother and kicking a puppy.

We have three kids. She went through some pretty serious post-partum depression with #2. Now, she is on an anti-depressant, which causes her to have orgasm issues. Which can make sex frustrating for her. But that is now, we've gone through this before that issue came along. We have alot working against us. So I try my best to give her space. I have asked her in the past, "Do you want me to just stop trying, and let you just make the first move?" She tells me no, she like's when I flirt with her. But damn, talk about spinning your wheels.

We have discussed and discussed. I work very hard to understand her, and what she is feeling. I love her with all my heart. Which only makes it worse when we go weeks at a time without any intimacy.

I feel like I'm starting to ramble. So, I'll leave it at that for now. Maybe I'll collect my thoughts again later, and post something a little more rational and constructive.

07-22-2004, 07:50 AM	#17 (permalink)
tooth Addict	I'm in the same boat, guys. Reading these posts, I felt like I could have written each one. Married for 6-1/2 yrs. We've been together for over 12 years. I have gone through most everything you guys have been talking about. Cold, cold, cold, or HOT, HOT, HOT. No middle ground. Sex is great when we have it. She's really into it and adventurous. But if she's not in the mood, I'm lucky to get anything more than a peck on the cheek. I don't need sex all the time. Wouldn't it be nice to just play around once in a while? I feel like she is not attracted to me when she keeps shooting down my advances. She tells me I am all wrong on this. But how am I supposed to feel when her words say one thing, and her actions tell me something completely different. Other than taking her out drinking, I have no idea what it takes to get her turned on. I can be as sweet and romantic as can be, and feel like I may as well be insulting her mother and kicking a puppy. We have three kids. She went through some pretty serious post-partum depression with #2. Now, she is on an anti-depressant, which causes her to have orgasm issues. Which can make sex frustrating for her. But that is now, we've gone through this before that issue came along. We have alot working against us. So I try my best to give her space. I have asked her in the past, "Do you want me to just stop trying, and let you just make the first move?" She tells me no, she like's when I flirt with her. But damn, talk about spinning your wheels. We have discussed and discussed. I work very hard to understand her, and what she is feeling. I love her with all my heart. Which only makes it worse when we go weeks at a time without any intimacy. I feel like I'm starting to ramble. So, I'll leave it at that for now. Maybe I'll collect my thoughts again later, and post something a little more rational and constructive.