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As far as the poster's question goes, I would say that 1. I agree with the majority of the above. Why let it bother you? It just wastes your time and energy. 2. Apparently you're not abnormal amongst the people here, but I suspect, based on my people-watching at malls and bars and such, that you probably are abnormal. Most people are going to say something, or else physically demonstrate their anger. Stare, follow, stalk, etc.
As far as racial slurs in general, not only do I agree that intent frames the way it's received, assuming it's coming from someone whose opinion you have some reason to care about, but I also think it would be kind of a sad world to live in without some racial slurs, gender slurs, etc. between friends. Being from the SouthEast originally, I still don't think I could call my black friends nigger to their face, nor would I want to, but can and do use negro and have been known to say "South Alabama porchmonkey, come home to your white master" a few times. Always works. Seriously, it's like telling my hard-core feminist friends to get their ass in the kitchen and fix me a sammich, and they'd better be half-dressed when they come back. It builds that special rapport, and works to get the superficial stuff out of the way. The people you've got to watch are the ones who always shy away from the superficial characterstics too much, all the time.
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You don't love me, you just love my piggy style
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