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here's what I think the deal is. Not so much of a double standard but a realization and generalization of the fact that, while tobacco is one of the most addictive drugs (more addictive than heroin), alcohol is not nearly as addictive. So, it is assumed that anyone who smokes is addicted. You are an extremely rare exception if you truly are not, but I don't think there's any convincing of your friends otherwise. Nonetheless, it is a simple fact. Someone who drinks semi-regularly is simply flat out not as likely to be addicted a someone who smokes semi-regularly.
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Le temps détruit tout
"Musicians are the carriers and communicators of spirit in the most immediate sense." - Kurt Elling
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