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Angel · 03-04-2004, 07:30 PM

It is obvious that the view of being independent can vary from one individual to another yet there are clearly aspects of independence that are a pattern here.

I think there is a sense of pride and self dignity that is a driving force behind independence. At least there is for me. I'm not sure that I would agree that being so, involves whether I want a man in my life to share my world with. It is about accomplishing things, setting goals, acting on what has to happen, taking care of the things life gives us.

I own my own home, I pay all my bills, I work hard for what I have, I change out dryer plugs when I find the outlet doesn't match the one the dryer has, I paint walls, I can lay carpet, I do beautiful flower arrangements, and this weekend I am going to tear a wall out in my garage where there is a small room I don't need. These are THINGS that are sometimes viewed as independent.
People say to me quite often, if you weren't so damned independent we would love to help you do stuff. And I admit, I can be independent to a fault.
I also think that when you can walk into a car dealership and they think they got "the woman" and you ask for a specific car and they don't have that right now but look at this... At this point, I, the independent one says "ahem, excuse me sir, DO YOU HAVE THE CAR I SEEK...YES OR NO?" THEN he says well, I can get it here by tomorrow. Well, okay, what is the price? Oh, I can't tell you the price, then you can go to someone else and get them to lower it and I lose you as a customer.
Now ladies, if you have stuck with me this far... THIS is where the truly independent woman steps in and takes charge.
Sir, in your unwillingness to quote me a price for fear I will go elsewhere, you bit off your nose to spite your face. I have no desire to do business with you. I'll go see so & so, they will do me fine. And she walks out. I will take a situation and go into it full blast head on if it is something that I see as a cause.

But yes, I love having a partner to share these things with. To do together or even have him do. I don't feel codependent for having the desire to share the load and not always wanting to do it all. I call that human nature.

And my night meds are kicking in and I think I might have quit making sense 3 paragraphs ago.

03-04-2004, 07:30 PM	#15 (permalink)
Angel Naughty Just Right Location: Euphoria	It is obvious that the view of being independent can vary from one individual to another yet there are clearly aspects of independence that are a pattern here. I think there is a sense of pride and self dignity that is a driving force behind independence. At least there is for me. I'm not sure that I would agree that being so, involves whether I want a man in my life to share my world with. It is about accomplishing things, setting goals, acting on what has to happen, taking care of the things life gives us. I own my own home, I pay all my bills, I work hard for what I have, I change out dryer plugs when I find the outlet doesn't match the one the dryer has, I paint walls, I can lay carpet, I do beautiful flower arrangements, and this weekend I am going to tear a wall out in my garage where there is a small room I don't need. These are THINGS that are sometimes viewed as independent. People say to me quite often, if you weren't so damned independent we would love to help you do stuff. And I admit, I can be independent to a fault. I also think that when you can walk into a car dealership and they think they got "the woman" and you ask for a specific car and they don't have that right now but look at this... At this point, I, the independent one says "ahem, excuse me sir, DO YOU HAVE THE CAR I SEEK...YES OR NO?" THEN he says well, I can get it here by tomorrow. Well, okay, what is the price? Oh, I can't tell you the price, then you can go to someone else and get them to lower it and I lose you as a customer. Now ladies, if you have stuck with me this far... THIS is where the truly independent woman steps in and takes charge. Sir, in your unwillingness to quote me a price for fear I will go elsewhere, you bit off your nose to spite your face. I have no desire to do business with you. I'll go see so & so, they will do me fine. And she walks out. I will take a situation and go into it full blast head on if it is something that I see as a cause. But yes, I love having a partner to share these things with. To do together or even have him do. I don't feel codependent for having the desire to share the load and not always wanting to do it all. I call that human nature. And my night meds are kicking in and I think I might have quit making sense 3 paragraphs ago. __________________ In the depth of winter, I finally learned that there was within me an invincible summer. ~Albert Camus Last edited by Angel; 03-04-2004 at 07:33 PM..