"You can call me any time. I mean it."

I'm sure that nearly all of us have heard these words out of a friend or loved one's mouth before. How many of us have actually taken advantage of the offer of those words, though?

My best friend was in town last night for a concert with a few friends. Because of their drive scheduling, I wasn't going to be able to see them before the concert, so I had half-forgotten about them being here until I got a phone call at midnight (about an hour after I'd fallen asleep).

"My car got towed. Is there ANY way you can take me to go pick it up so we can get home?"

My response: "Of course! I'll be there in 10 minutes, tops."

And I was. It was about an hour out of my night to help out my best friend (who had to pay $174 to get her car back - predatory towing on campus is unreal), and it didn't bother me in the slightest. I know she'd do the same for me if the situation arose. Besides, I laughed my ass off when one of the 3 friends with her offered the tow truck guys some breastmilk in exchange for a discount on the fee.

Have you ever had to call someone for help like that at a bad time? Have you received a phone call like that at an odd hour? What was your response?

 

I have done it many times for my friends. Alot of times it has been the "im drunk can you come and get me". And I crawl out of bed and go help my friends because that's how we are. I try do to as I would want to be done to. I have no problem helping my friends out in a time of need.
I guess its how we were raised and how we are with our friends. Sometimes I have helped people that I don't even know just because its the right thing to do. What of my wife or daughter needed help. Would some stranger help them? Id like to think so that's why I do it. I have changed peoples tires on the side of the road before. Makes no difference to me who they are.
I admire you PonyPotato people need friends like you.

 

I've never been the caller, but have occasionally been the callee.

Reminds me of a joke:

Good friends are people you can call at 3am to bail you out of jail. Best friends are in the next cell going "Man, that was fuckin' awesome!"

 

I've never made the offer, but I've been called many times. I guess I have SAP written across my forehead. I have few people that I trust for emergencies. I've called a few people, on the rare occasion that I've needed help, and the response is far from overwhelming. Good thing I can count on me then

 

I like your slightly(?) cynical tone, Cayvmann. Experiences of giving help without hesitation but getting a hesitant or negative response when you reach out will do that. It did me. I know I can count on me. If I absolutely have to I'll ask for help but the last time was many years ago and the the deciding factor was I had a grammar school kid with me.
I've narrowed the group of people I would drop everything for to go to their aid. If I say 'call me anytime,' I don't need to say "I mean it,' 'cos otherwise I'd not utter the words.

 

That reminds me of my dad and our mixed-up restaurant caper.
My dad was a quirky kind of fellow, mostly because of his experimental Epilepsy meds. (back in the 70's)
We stopped to help a family on the side of the road with their flat tire during a rainstorm.
My dad was pretty garrulous and apparently so was the other dad, for not long after, they were like old friends.
After the tire change, the guy told my dad whenever we were in the next town over, we should come and be guests at their family restaurant.
A few weeks pass and we're in the next town and he decides we were going to go have our free meal at their restaurant.
I don't know if the original guy ever had the intention of honoring his "promise", (I like to think he did) but we went to the wrong restaurant, and my dad wouldn't let it go that we were at the wrong place, and the owner/manager was such a nice guy, (and probably wanted us the hell out of there, asap) he gave us a huge discount on our bill. My mother, not to mention we kids, were so mortified.

Anyway, I like to help out when I can, and I've been given help in situations, myself. Yeah, so what comes around, goes around.

 

This also helped me to understand helping

 

ralphie250 : You tease, your image is rexxed!

 

I've only recently decided to quit helping people who otherwise don't have time for me. I still had the guilt, but I'm getting over that too.

Some people, I would help every time, but that's mainly people I see as otherwise "helpless", and people who are rock solid friends when I need them.

 

I see it. Ill try again.

 

I have a few people in my life who will get my immediate, no-questions assistance, but only a few. QW, on the other hand, will almost never say "No" to just about anyone. In fact, right now she's on a mission of mercy.

A young man my daughter dated a couple of times is moving and had to return his rental truck before he was finished. She's over there with our van, hauling the final load. He's a good guy, and as with virtually all of our kids' friends, he's been adopted into our extended family.

 

I love the description of a best friend as someone you know you can call at 2am because you're worried/upset/in trouble and they won't be upset because they're your best friend, but you won't call at 2am because they're your best friend and you don't want to bother them.

I got a call from my brother-in-law last fall at about 8:30am on a Sunday... they had shot a 1200 lb moose the afternoon before and needed to have it registered by noon, but had had flat on the trailer they were using. Was there anyway I could run over in my truck and help them out? So I got dressed, drove an hour to where they were, we spent an hour loading the thing into my truck and tying it down (1200 lbs is a LOT of dead weight!!). We got it to the ranger station with 45 minutes to spare.

Now my brother-in-law and his 2 pals think I'm the greatest guy in the world for all my inconvenience. My take on it was that I had great little adventure to break up a dull Sunday. I'm a non-hunter, but I was peripherally involved in a moose hunt. So, for having a little bit of fun myself helping out some friends, I get to look like a nice guy.

And maybe that's what I like about my friends... I don't mind them helping me because I know they don't mind, and I enjoy helping them simply because it makes me feel good when I do. No matter what that involves.

 

I've only ever made the offer to family. And only family (including SOs) has ever called in a request. Only made the call myself once and it was from jail (the only time I've ever been in jail).

 

Same here. And for much the same reasons. It's a matter of what world do I believe I live in, and what world do I support.

@Cayvmann's and @Fangirl's hesitancy I share: there are people who do not live in this world, but who insist on it being there for their own benefit. These days I am - a bit - better at identifying them.

 

This is why I don't call "friends" anymore:

Call friends from bar when drunk - check

Friends show up - check

Friends help limp you home - check

Friends clean up blood from broken window incident - check

Friends move you out of puke pile - check

Friends take off your shirt - uh... check?

Friends take video of you laying in toilet while being caressed along the head, neck, and back with k-bar knife - ...........

 

That's funny, that was my first answer. Twenty some years ago my (now) ex called me from jail around 3am. He and a friend were both drunk, and his friend was arrested for DUI. I told him to sleep it off on the bench and hung up.

I did help my nephew when he called after midnight. He had just gotten off work, slid on wet pavement around a corner, and drove his itty bitty car off the road and into a ditch. He knew I would be the one with a truck big enough to pull it out.