QOTD #90: What's your story? Starting conversations

So, what's your story?

And other conversation starters.

Share your conversation starters. Describe how it usually works for you.
Are there any conversation starters that you've found to be more effective in the workplace vs in your social life? How is this different from a pick-up line?

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"What's your story," is the question that I like to ask people when I first meet them.
It often takes people off-guard, and I end up asking more questions. But it's usually a pretty good conversation starter.

Here's how it usually goes:
So, tell me, what's your story? "Huh?"
How did you get to be where you are now? "Uhh..."
Give me a quick sum-up of your life to this point - what can you tell me about your life history in 5 minutes?
Here, I'll start:
I grew up in Southern California. My dad was a mechanic, my mom worked with kids. I went to college in Utah, dropped out, worked odd jobs while attending community college, fell in love with a guy I knew since high school, transferred to a school I never expected to get into, graduated, married, we ran off to grad school in Ohio. First daughter was born in Ohio. Moved to Texas for my husband's job, where we had our second child. I'm still working on my PhD, from my home office. I study botany. I've always loved plants.

Now, Is there anything in that description that you can grab hold of, relate to, and ask more questions about? "Yeah?"
Cool, we've got fodder for conversation now.
So now, tell me about you! What's your story?
"Well... I grew up..."

 

So what about you???

I know I use this, either as a starter...or even asking those I've known for awhile.

And BTW...I'm sincerely interested. I like it when people share about themselves. It's just so rarely that they will truly share.
Much less banter back & forth without shame on both of your experiences.

Mostly it's smoke & mirrors.
Or one person wanting the whole show until they are finished.
It's not about who's more important or being rude...it's about flow of thought and not judging.
We can only be responsible for our own story.

I came from nothing.
I'm proud I do something.

It's amazing how many are not interested.
Nor are interested in expressing themselves either.

 

When facilitating group discussion work in an education setting, it's important to get them talking to each other - about anything - if you want them to eventually discuss the course material.

I like the idea of asking about music, literature, and films. I'm going to keep that one in mind.

Another question that I used in a biology lab was to have the students talk to each other about their favorite pet or wild animal. That one can be terribly dull, or really fun depending on the classroom dynamic.

 

When making small talk in a professional/semi-professional setting I'll often ask if they have any trips or vacations planned soon, or if they've taken any recently. Or I'll ask if they have anything going on during the weekend. This will often get them talking about something positive, and usually leads down various digressions about their family, personal interests, or other topics they enjoy. Often a vacation or weekend trip is planned around what their children enjoy or activities their children participate in, or an area they love, or a hobby they have. It almost always avoids controversial topics, and can give me some personal insight into who they really are.

 

That's a really neat concept!
I'm going to have to remember that one.