Plan Your Death!

Inspired by the Organ Donor thread, since a few people are starting to talk about further plans for their worldly remains. Though the title makes it sound flippant, it is a legitimate subject. So, when you shuffle off this mortal coil, what do you hope will be done with your corporeal remains? How do you want people to remember you? Do you have specific designs for your funeral/memorial/wake?

For my own part, if I have anything useful left in my body, I want it harvested to benefit anyone who may need viable organs. All else is to be cremated. I want no funeral; no one weeping around my lifeless shell. A wake, a memorial party--for want of a better expression. A room full of music, fond stories, and as much laughter as people can muster. I have seriously considered stipulating in my will that attendants to my memorial must wear at least one piece of tie-dyed clothing. After everything, at a time of his/her/their choosing, whoever has possession of the ashes will scatter them at the base of Smith Falls in Nebraska. My wife jokes that she'll flush my ashes down a public toilet at some beloved restaurant. I'm okay with that, too.

 

The only coffin I want my body to be placed in is one of those simple wooden ones you see in damn near every western film every made, something that could be made in an hour or less in shop class with decent scrap lumber. None of those $5000+ lead lined boxes that will last for 300 years; let the box rot quickly enough and the worms/etc get to my empty shell.
The location is a better question. If I were to drop tonight for what reason, I truly do not know or care on a practical level where my burial plot would be. This area is not "home" to me and shipping my body back to Oregon sounds like a waste of money.

 

I have already expressed my wishes to my family, I want a cardboard or wicker coffin, no embalming and buried in a green cemetery not that far from me and have a tree planted on my head, my youngest asked what if one of my eyeballs came up with the tree branches !!!
No one is to wear black, and I want my favourite songs blasted on an old 80's ghetto blaster. Then a piss up afterwards. Celebrate that I was here for whatever time I had than mourn what was.
And definitely no vicar that has never met me and talks crap for an hour, I am not religious but would prefer a more pagan type ceremony.
If they allowed funeral pyres in the UK I would like to have one of those, after they have stripped me of all useful organs.

 

Recycle anything useful, BBQ the rest, and toss the ashes somewhere pretty ... I'm fond of high alpine lakes ... surprise me.

No wake and I'll come back and haunt anyone that decides on open casket anything for me.

 

I am an organ donor, also. Before surgery last Feb. I told my wife I wanted to be cremated. 18 months ago we lost a good friend who was cremated. His wife has his remains in an urn on their fireplace mantle. Dennis also had each of his children pick out a smaller urn for some of his remains to be placed in for them. I want that for my sons as well.

Dennis did not want a funeral or any type of service. However, a few months later the family had a memorial service at their house for family and close friends. The family needed closure, badly. They needed that moment of final public grief in order to move on. We shared stories, looked at pictures and all of us laughed and cried. I think we all needed it. So yes, I want some sort of a service following death to allow those around me to begin the process of moving forward.

Thank you Dennis for showing me how to die.

 

I am considering donating my body to an anatomy program. Much of my learning came from the willingness of someone to allow their body to be used for cadaver lab, so I might as well pass the favor on to future generations of students. This is assuming I live long enough or die of a disease or condition that would make my organs unusable.

Otherwise, I'd rather donate my organs (I am a registered donor) and be cremated. No big thing.

 

I thought this thread was going to be about actually planning a death....not what you do with the body after. I do not want to get eaten up by cancer...which I will inevitably get thanks to my awesome family history. As soon as I hear the word terminal or inoperable, I'm going to the south of France. I'm going to take a lot of pills. I'm going to wash said pills down with a bottle or two of some fancy, French wine. I will pass out in some vineyard never to wake up again. I don't ever want anyone to have to watch me die in a hospital bed.

If I am ever found, I'd like to donate my remains to one of those body farms to study how a body decays in certain environments and situations. I would be helping scientists and maybe help catch a killer.

Funerals and the sorts are for the living to have closure. I really don't care what happens. I'd like to think that there would be a lot of crazy friends singing rugby songs and drinking lots of beer, wine and tequila. I foresee a lot of drink-ups at various bars on both coasts. They will tell crazy stories about me and laugh more than cry.

 

That reminded me of this gem from Bob Hope:
According to one of Hope's daughters, when asked on his deathbed where he wanted to be buried, he told his wife, "Surprise me."

Now a thread about planning a death in a strictly hypothetical fashion and how to dispose of the bodies would be interesting. I can call it research for my "end of the world" story, the character that is a serial killer is one of the more interesting ones.

 

I did make it sound that way, didn't I? If the thread wants to turn down that road, I'm down with it. I'll have to think about my preferred circumstances....

 

I was thinking that, much like ZS, this was a thread on planning how I would die.

And that's up for debate.

Because most people would say something like, "At the age of 90 while in bed with a hot blonde 18 year old."

But then that's like... if you actually get to pick your death, you know at 90 to avoid hot blondes. Also, you might be in incredible physical pain by then from some wasting disease, wanting to die, but knowing you can't until you're 90 and can find a hot blonde willing to bang you.

So I was going to say something like, "Doing DP with Karl Urban and Henry Rollins until I had a heart attack from too many orgasms" but then, really, what a mood kill on an otherwise fantastic day.

I'm just going to let life surprise me on both counts. As long as religion doesn't feature into my funeral, I'm happy.

 

I think we all pretty much agree that the concept of a funeral is for the surviving. I also think that, while it's for the benefit of the living, it should honour the spiritual or philosophical views of the departed. If the deceased saw the life and magic in the nature around her, she should have a pagan funeral; if one was an atheist, God should not figure into the memorial; if one was Catholic, the funeral should be comprised of all the rites and responses that go with that religion. Several years ago, I attended the funeral of a dear friend's mother--one we all considered an adopted mother of sorts. During the funeral, the preacher actually said, "she wouldn't want us to talk about her; she'd want us to talk about Jesus." Almost every person there who actually knew her looked at each other and shared the common thought: What pompous, pretentious BS! This cat is full of shit! Not because of any anti-christian sentiment; it was just apparent that he knew her less than anyone else there and should not have been allowed to officiate.

 

That's what I thought, too. Thinking about it... I could die so easily.

So very, very easily.

No one knows my own schedule as intimately as I do! I would know when I wasn't using my car so I could snip the brake lines! I would be able to tell the snipers exactly when I would be near a window! I could even slip something lethal into my drink when I wasn't looking!

The best part of it all? No one would ever suspect me!

BWA-HA-HA-HA-HA-Ha...

*realizes flaw in plan, goes back to scrubbing the deep fryer*

 

Ok, to actually plan my death.......... I would like to ride a very very fast motorbike straight into the side of a rockface. but then that would be a bit selfish for the people who would have to pick up my bits of road pizza.
If I was terminal I would end it with an overdose and copious amounts of Smirnoff triple distilled. I do not want to spend the last days of my life on a 'end of life ward' no way.
I would notify my family of my plans so the british police didnt harass them looking for a murderer, but I wouldn't leave a note or my life insurance wouldn't pay out.
I know the place I want to close my eyes for the last time and it overlooks a beautiful estuary on the Gower. That would be the best memory to take with me to the unknown.

 

I really don't care what happens to my body after I am dead. That said, please use the useful bits to help others and do with the rest, what makes things easiest for my friends and family.

As for how I'd like to go? In my sleep, after a great meal and some hot sex.

 

I would like to go peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather - not screaming - like his passengers......

Your life insurance would normally pay out (unless you had recently taken out the policy - there is usually a one or two year moratorium - or there was a specific exclusion based on your proposal).

Peter Sellers 'went' on Britt Ekland, I like his style.