Man Goals

I've always considered myself a bit of a stud when it comes to living in the woods and manliness in general. That being said, tonight I decided to make the sacrifice necessary to achieve the state of sublime drunkeness necessary to become introspective of all the awesomeness that is me....and have come to the conclusion that a lot of my awesome and manly skills are perishable and that I haven't exactly been sustaining them. Unacceptable. For example; I can't remember the last time I started a fire in wet-weather condistions with one of those magnesium fire-starters or have hunted, killed, cleaned and eaten a mammal smaller than myself. So for tomorrow, I have set the rugged and manly goals of sobering up, starting a fire and killing and eating something smaller than me.

Monday, I will be catching small animals with snares and building and sleeping in a lean-to.

Anyone else care to join me in this experiment? Any suggestions on how to further test my manhood and general level of "alpha as fuck"?

 

If I wasn't working and lived in your general vicinity, I'd totally join you.

Thumper's been pissing me off, anyway.

 

You are going to smear the blood of your prey on your face, right?

 

You should use it's bones to decorate your man-cave.

 

I got off to a slow start as I woke up at the crack of noon and forgot to feed my dog this morning. As such, the first squirrel I shot got immediately devoured by my dog - he was a bit quicker than me due to being motivated by hunger while I was more than a little hungover and nursing an ankle injury - the whole ordeal was equal parts hilarious and gross. Second one was a charm and cleaning it was no biggie. Cooked him on a spit over a fire that took all of 20 minutes to get going. Rodent still tastes like greasy dark-meat. All-in-all, I was kind of disappointed in how easy all of this was.

No blood smearing or skull collecting yet. I think I will save that for a non-rodent.

I'm off to pound more gatorade and asprin and make sweet, sweet love to my couch.

 

I am love the idea of this thread. Slims and I talked about something like this, where he went on a 2 week survial wilderness adventure and took my city boy ass with him. I'd love to be able to do something like this and really would love to train for this. My big problem with this would be training, as I have none.

Care to spend two weeks in the woods, letting a non-trained guy learn what he needs to learn to survive? It would be like city slickers but without Billy Crystal.

 

First, some humor:

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Man, I wish I was that eloquent when drunk.

Walt's a regular fucking Hemingway here.

I'm jealous of his manly writing.

 

I just finished eating spaghetti that's been sitting in my fridge for a week, does that count?

 

We collected the bones of small dead rodents and decorated our OCS guide-on. It was legendary. I shit you not.