Do you lose control?

An episode from the drama tv show that is my life last night just hit home how much people lose control when they are angry and can't think straight. That of course, is unrelated to this thread as I'd just like to know if this is a normal phenomena. What are your stories of losing control or people reacting in the most unproductive, counter-intuitive manner possible?

I don't lose control. You could tell me you just infected me with AIDS and I will not chuck things across the room. I'll be angry, I won't toss things around. I can calm myself down. I don't believe in "crimes of passion" or similar stupid things done in "the heat of the moment".

Personally, anger is an excuse to act out like an asshole. When I get angry I like to think things through and fix whatever can be fixed or salvaged. No use in crying over spilled milk.

Can you be so angry and not know what your next actions are? Can you injure a person over some slight? Can you be seduced into having sex without a condom? What are your experiences in losing control? And do you recognize when your body is moving and acting by itself?

 

A number of years ago when I started working after high school and ended up in the situation where I was supporting a parent, there were times when I would try to have a discussion about money only to have it quickly unravel and degenerate into an argument that would often be so bad that I would leave and drive around for a while just for the sake of driving, typically ending in me staying in a hotel for the night. Which was somewhat unproductive as it meant I was having to spend money on hotels withing relative proximity of my house. But even more so was some time later when things just to the point where I just kinda shutdown. I just stopped going to work and just kinda stopped caring about anything. It was definitely unproductive, but at the time, I felt like there was nothing else I could do, that there was nothing left I could try doing to make things work better.

I always tried to avoid things becoming an argument that didn't have to be one, I would try to be rational and logical. Even more so now, I've become more avoidant to arguments, even other people's argument's. I live with two other family members now, and there have been times when I've put headphones on to listen to music just so that I wouldn't have to hear them bickering at each other. But there still going to be times when something gets the point where it does have to be addressed, which sometimes requires being louder as its been my experience that some people just won't take something seriously unless you're more emphatic about it. But I think that anything that would get to a point of me losing control, would have the result of me trying to escape it, trying to detach myself from it. I don't think there would be much of a problem at such a point unless someone refused to leave me alone.

 

i'm usually extremely level headed and mortified if i accidently or out of necessity have to let my problems splash off on other people, and that includes channels via voice and action.

the one exception to this condition is when i am gaming on my pc with other people and we're talking over teamspeak with our headsets. i get sensitive about being detrimental to my team and am hard on myself about it, so when someone calls me out in a moment where i've made a mistake i will snap at them before i have time to think about it rationally in an attempt to shut them up, and usually feel like an asshole for doing it.

 

I mean I do that too when I'm driving and I'm alone, I can vent and run my mouth like a refined sailor at other vehicles. I don't, however, pull death defying stunts to cut them off so I can properly display my middle finger at their eye level. I mean there has to be a limit to some of this shit.

 

I've done it....once...when some jackass wouldnt take no for an answer and decided his dick needed to be inside me

 

I have a real short temper. It has ended me up in jail before. Ive learned to control it some over the years but its not always under control. I have a tendancy to just react. Not good..... espically when youre the size i am.

 

I don't lose control.
Unlike Ralphie, I'm 150 pounds soaking wet with a pocket full of rocks, so getting physically hostile was never in my best interest.
I am, however, very calculating.
Piss me off, I mean really piss me off, and you best watch your back for a long time afterwards.

 

I'm more the calculating, vindictive type. I'll get even; but it won't be impulsive.

 

When I was a kid, I had a very hot temper. I used to get picked on and would get into fights all the time (we are talking grade school here). As I got older, I realized that I didn't like this part of myself. I learned to control my anger.

I still have a temper, but I do not lose control and let it rage. I can get angry but it takes quite a bit to push me over the edge. In the end, I just let most things wash over me. There isn't much that's worth getting upset about.

(but I still succumb to the lure of road rage... there is something about being in a car that brings it out)

 

I can get angry, but I never lose control. I always know what I am saying and I say what I mean. I've never raised a hand to a person in my life. All of my 'violence' is of the verbal and written variety.

Work is a curious thing because very often I have to stand there and try to communicate with someone who is angry, sometimes legitimately and sometimes not, and it is frustrating, you know, to not be able to say what you are thinking. And then sometimes, people are just exasperating as hell for various reasons. After these exchanges, I will sometimes have to go into the back and vent. My co-workers are tickled by the colorful and emphatic uses I find for the word 'fuck.'

The key to being a successful, likable asshole is knowing when and where it is appropriate to let the fuck flag fly. You can't go around just taking it out on anyone. I hate that. I hate it with a passion.

jees, i'm tired. hope that makes sense.

 

Nah. I'm too sensible. Hell, the vast majority of the time I can't even lose control when I'm binge drinking.

I'm too orderly. I fold my socks for fun. I was in the Boy Scouts and the military. I embrace control.

Everybody engages in revenge fantasies, violent ideation, etc. That's all perfectly natural.

What isn't natural is giving into them. Especially when you've had cool down time.

 

...YOU TALKIN' TO ME? WHY YOU SAYIN' THAT BUT LOOKIN' AT ME? WHY I OUGHTA...

 

I don't typically lose control, but I have before...

I remember a specific time some dude decided to hit me in the head with a broom stick. I'm not sure if it was the anger that ensued or simply the blow to the head that caused me to black out for 30 seconds to a minute, but when I came back to reality, dude was in a clump on the floor bleeding.

That's the only time I can think of that I fully lost control to the point that I had no idea what I was doing.

I'm pretty sure in order to hit that point again, I would need another blow to my dome.

 

Why is Zeraph not posting in this thread?​

Oh, right.​

 

Oh my fucking god!

People remember what they want to remember, ignore what you are saying and hear what they want to hear. It is so assinine. How can someone be in a relationshipo with these people.
Nothing will ever get resolved with that attitude.

 

Only once in a while, when needed.

 

Uh... logic no work.

 

I can only think of one time I would say I completely lost control of myself.

I wont go into the details, but I was 15 and at school and I got into a fight with a guy who was a year older than me.

It was a fair fight and he beat me. He put me on the floor and as he stood over me I started to half-cry and he laughed at me, and that was too much and I lost control, and went too far. I broke his arm quite badly and a some of his ribs, and the police were involved but I never got charged. There was a second I wanted to kill him. I didnt just want to kill him, I wanted to rip his throat out with my teeth (obviously I didn't)

Ive been in fights since, and Ive done stupid things since (and yes Ive thrown punches at people), probably up until my late 20's... but Ive never had a flash of rage like I had that time when I felt totally disconnected from my body and just went at somebody and wanted to take them apart. When it happened I didnt "see red", it was like the whole world became white or different levels of white. I couldnt feel my arms but I was swinging, it was like all colour suddenly bled out of the world and my head was ticking like a time bomb and I just felt like an animal and I wanted to tear everything to shreds. It wasnt a good feeling.